The Hidden Sun
by NeonDomino
Summary: Bella and Jacob feel the effects of being without their imprint. Problem is they don't know that they imprinted on each other and don't know whats causing the pain.
1. Chapter 1

Jacob didn't remember the day the pain started but Billy remembered all too well. He remembered Jacob was 15, and they were driving back from Forks Hospital for one of his check-ups. They were passing the shops and Jacob spaced out for a moment when they had stopped at a set of traffic lights. He remembers when Jacob snapped out of it, he mentioned feeling really weird he said something had happened but Billy didn't read much into it at the time.

Renée didn't know when the pain started with Bella - she seemed so happy when Renée knocked on the door of Charlie's to collect her. She seemed happy for the day that Renée spent there, and Renée was glad that Bella enjoyed time with her dad, Renée felt she deserved a break from being a mother and was glad that she could send Bella to her fathers for a few weeks. Renée took Bella in the car and pulled up at a set of traffic lights. Bella was silent for a few moments, not that Renée noticed this. She ignored Bella telling her that something strange happened. She tuned Bella out and thought about the horrible journey home.

2 months passed and Billy had noticed changes in Jacobs behaviour - Jacob was eating a bit less and was caught just staring into space or out of the window. He complained about an uncomfortable feeling and that he felt wrong. Billy started feeling concerned and decided to take Jacob to the hospital to be checked out. Jacob was complaining since that car ride and it had only gotten worse

2 months after Renée had taken Bella home she started noticing Bella had lost weight, she had bags under her eyes from not sleeping. Renée just put it down to boy troubles - what girl wasn't always trying to get skinnier and losing sleep over one boy or another?

By the 1 year point Jacob was in agony. There had been tests run on him in the hospital but no-one could find a thing to cause him all the discomfort or his inability to eat. Jacob tried to force himself to eat but he found it difficult. The hospital considered that he had an eating disorder and monitored him.

1 year in and Renée finally took a good look at Bella. She was thin - too thin and she told Bella about anorexia and bulimia. She had a few concerns but Bella was a good girl and would listen to her. She tried to think back to when this started and realised the last time she saw Bella happy was back in Forks

By the time Jacob reached 18, he had spent more time in the hospital then out of the hospital. Billy was scared that he would lose his son. So many tests had been ran on him to find out what was wrong and the hospital discharged him once again. Jacob was in constant agony he struggled to breathe sometimes, could barely eat, couldn't sleep he knew he was broken and part of him was missing and that was the part that kept the pain away. He wanted to give up a long time ago - 3 years was a long time to live in so much pain that you felt as though you were dying. He made his choice, he walked to the edge of the cliff and jumped.

Bella was sitting with her mum having lunch - or picking at her lunch. She was really trying to eat but was so skinny. Renée had tried everything to help her even sending her to a therapist but nothing helped. It was a chore to even get Bella to eat and Renée was sick to death of looking after Bella 24/7 hell she could barely look after herself let alone my daughter. She was toying with the idea to send her to Forks and letting Charlie have a go at fixing her. Suddenly Bella jumped out of her seat. She fell to the floor in agony, worse than Renée had ever seen her, the sounds coming from Bella scared her and she called an ambulance. Whilst waiting she made the choice. Bella was going back to Forks to live.

**A/N**  
**I own nothing**  
**Had this idea for a while. I'm going to do a Bella POV and a Jacob POV for these 3 years before I continue with the story**.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N - Hope you all enjoyed the first chapter. This one is to say how each felt during those 3 years. I was going to go into more details but didn't want to drag it out.**

**I own nothing**

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**Those 3 years for Jacob**

I remember when the pain started. I had sat in the van with my dad on his way back from his check up. I was making a list of things I needed to do and thinking what I can make for dinner and looking out of the window. We were going down the high street and I was people watching then suddenly there is a blur in my memory. I can't think what happened between people watching and leaving town. I told my dad that I felt weird that something was wrong but he put it down to me being tired from the journey. I thought at the time maybe he was right.

I remember the next few days I felt slightly empty like something was missing. It got to the point where I couldn't eat. I would faze out for hours at a time. Dad finally took me seriously and took me to the hospital, and for the next 3 years were test after test in the hospital. They first said I was a hormonal teenager, then considered an eating disorder but after keeping him in and watching him force feed himself. By 18 I was diagnosed with Depression caused by my mother's death. That was rubbish but the hospital had no idea what was wrong with me. I tried not taking the tablets as they made no difference but Billy started watching to make sure I took them.

Quil and Embry stood by me, they believed when I told them of the pain I was in. I explained that I felt like I was slowly dying inside and struggled to breath. That I felt as though part of me had been ripped away. I didn't feel like a whole person I felt broken.. damaged and in constant pain.

That's what brought me here, to the cliff. I don't know if I can take the pain anymore. The hospital have more-or-less given up on me. I'm just a burden on everyone. If I wasn't around then Billy could focus on his own health and not mine. Quil and Embry could move on with their lives instead of me holding them back... and I could finally get rid of the pain.

The note Ieft for my dad explained all this. I didn't want him to think this was his fault I made it clear I knew he done all he could think of, but I couldn't continue like this anymore.

Now I had made my decision I felt strangely calm. I walked to the edge of the cliff and looked straight out to see. I closed my eyes and said a prayer - who was I praying to I didn't know but I asked forgiveness for the selfish act I was about to commit. I took a deep breath... and Jumped.

The second I got pulled under the water I felt... something. I felt someone else's pain - did they feel my pain. Something inside me told me that they did and this was causing them agony. My last feeling before it all went dark was guilt. Guilt that I could be making someone else feel the same way I felt to cause me to end my life.

**Those 3 years for Bella  
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Everything started when I left Forks. I had a blackout. Renée pulled me out of that... shaking me slightly and calling my name. Maybe that blackout was the start of something. I think I wanted to stay in Forks so bad that I made myself ill.

Renée had a talk not long after we came back about boys and what I should look like. To be honest I didn't pay much attention. I had no interest in any boys at my school which was weird as I did before I left. I hadn't slept much either. It all went downhill from there. The pains came and I would wake up drenched in sweat. I would be breathless and feel suffocated and as though someone was restricting my breathing. Before I knew it I was so skinny that I could see my ribs. It was a horrible sight and I started wearing layers of clothes to hide the jutting out evidence of my illness.

Renée discussed eating disorders with me. I knew I never had one as I wasn't intentionally starving myself and I wasn't forcing myself to be sick when I ate... it was just happening. I tried to explain but she didn't seem to realise there was a difference. My therapist didn't have a clue and nothing seemed to make a difference. We tried Yoga to hopefully make me calm and relaxed but that didn't work either.

By the time I reached 18 I was so thin that I wore too many clothes to cover myself. I felt dead inside and didn't want to live anymore. I contemplated ending it but deep down I knew there was a reason for this pain and when I find it, all will be better and it will be more than worth it. I never bought tablets in bulk and used cream hair removal instead of razors. I didn't want the temptation to be too much for me to withstand.

Then the day came where I felt as though I was drowning. I thought I was going to die right there in my kitchen. I knew at that moment that I was no alone, no this was someone else's pain, someone else was going to die and then I realised I must be in so much pain because I have their pain and my own.

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**To be clear it was at the moment of the risk of a death that they felt some sort of connection to each other - enough to know that there was someone else that shared their pain and whos pain they shared. They don't understand the bond though.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N - Hope you enjoy this chapter. There's a lot of back and forth from Bella and Jacob in this hope it's not too much and still easy to follow :)**

**I own nothing**

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**Jacob**

I woke up a couple of days later with my dad by my bedside. I was in forks hospital which was a surprise as my dad wouldn't come here since Dr. Cullen started here. The look on his face when I woke up - relief that I was awake and pain that I tried to kill myself covered his face. "I'm sorry dad" I whispered. We both knew it wasn't an apology for my attempt on my life - I was apologising for him having to look after me for the last few years and I looked away as to not see the agony on his face that he couldn't help me.

"I've convinced the hospital to try again re-run the tests to see if anything has changed" Billy said, trying to keep his voice firm "please promise me you'll give the tests another change"

I thought for a moment, and nodded. "I promise" I told him. The least I could do is keep this promise. Now that I realised I shared pain with someone else meant maybe if I have mine and theirs both that's why I can't cope. If I could just work out how to handle this maybe find this other person somehow. With that thought on my mind I dozed off, hearing my father mention something about Quil and Embry coming to see me later.

**Bella**

I woke up in the hospital, Phil was sitting next to me reading a book. Once he noticed I opened my eyes he grabbed me into a hug. There was a confusing explanation that my body reacted as though I was drowning it was not able to draw in any air and I collapsed. Phil explained that Renée was at a loss and the Doctors were at a loss too. I remember him suggesting that since this started when I left Forks maybe going back would trigger a memory or help in some way, or maybe the hospital there would find something. I knew Renée had sent Phil to do her dirty work to get rid of me and at that point I didn't care - Renée had stopped me from seeing Charlie these 3 years and now I can go see him again. I told Phil I wanted to go there as soon as possible and the hospital agreed to move my care to Forks and allowed me to be temporarily discharged.

**Jacob**

When I woke up again, Embry and Quil were there. They smiled at me as though they didn't judge what I had done. I felt more than lucky to have friends like them - even more so when I found out that they had followed me to make sure I was ok and jumped after me. My life was down to these guys, considering them jumping could have potentially caused them injuries too.

I explained why I had done it, and although neither of them agreed with my choice they could understand the need to stop the pain. I told them about my last moments I found I was sharing the pain with someone else, I was feeling theirs they were feeling mine and I wanted to work out what that meant. Embry and Quil seemed to think about this for a while but it was the only hope that was left and they decided to help me.

They also mentioned that the talk of the town was Charlie Swan's daughter was coming back to town. Great news as I have longed for the day she came back every year for her holiday and haven't seen her in a long time. I resolved that I would force myself to eat if needed I can't let her see me like this.

**Bella**

The tickets were booked for the next day and I was out of the hospital. I didn't care about what Renée had to say - she kept me from Charlie for 3 years saying he didn't want me to go there and I believed her and now she's tired of me she's packing me off. yes I know its hard looking after someone who needs so much help I know so well because I've looked after her in that way for years. She seemed to think my condition had something to do with Forks and that was another reason to tell me to stay here now she was sending me back there maybe it is tied to Forks I mean it started not long after we left didn't it?

Renée and Phil (out of guilt on Renée's part) said they would sort me out with some money - I tried to refuse it but didn't have much arguing energy in me and gave in. Phil checking in my case with me and walked me through to check my ticket. I gave him a hug and Renee who I had quickly forgiven on the basis that she did try her hardest and in these circumstances could take their toll on anyone. In all honesty for a women who couldn't even look after herself she did put the effort in looking after me. I checked my ticket and put my carry-on case on the conveyor I emptied my pockets into the metal tray and went through all the medication and showed letters from the hospital stating what I was taking through. I turned before I was out of sight and waved to Phil and my mum and walked through.

Today was an effective day with the tablets, they seemed to have a slight better effect of me then usual - there were the odd days like this and I always made the most of the days I had. I made the most of today by going to get a big meal knowing that I might be able to eat most of it, and managed a whole Lasagne, garlic bread and fries. I looked around the shops and bought a couple of magazines a drink and some snacks before it was time to get on my plane. I quickly sent a text to Phil asking him to let Charlie know, I didn't have a number for Charlie after all and headed to my plane.

**Jacob**

I got out of hospital the next day and they must have pumped a lot of crap into my body because I felt that bit better than usual - maybe it was the knowledge that there could be a solution to my illness. I made the most of the day as I knew Bella was coming back I got my hair cut (making sure it was still long, but easier to manage) and me, Quil and Embry took my dad to the Diner where we met with Charlie who was waiting to hear which plane Bella would be arriving on.

Charlie was beside himself with excitement and I'd never really seen him excited about something - just happy/sad he wasn't one big on emotions. I was curious why he hadn't seen her in so long and Charlie explained that last time Bella was here they got into a massive fight Renée accused Charlie of trying to turn Bella against her to keep Bella in Forks which obviously wasn't true and then when he tried to contact them they had moved and changed numbers. When he heard from Renée a few days ago saying that Bella wasn't herself and could do with a change of scenery maybe a fresh start. Charlie was so happy. I was happy too sounds like Bella is moving down here to me!

We ate, I managed to eat a whole portion of the fries I ordered - I always order light to avoid wasting too much money. I still felt hungry. I asked my dad if its ok to order a burger - for the first time in 3 years I actually felt the need to eat. I felt 4 sets of eyes looking at me with something I hadn't seen in a long time.

Hope.

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**Bella being ill for the last 3 years didn't have the energy to just up and leave nor the money to afford to go as she was too ill to even work. She had no way of fighting against Renee to go see Charlie or even try contact him to see if what Renee said was true.**


	4. Chapter 4

Sorry about the delay in the chapter. Enjoy and please review

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**CPOV**

Bella's plane would be landing in a few hours and I felt happy for the first time in a long time. I remembered the last time she was here, how she just lit up the place her presence made all the difference and when she left 3 years ago Renée accused me of trying to turn Bella against her to keep her in Forks.

She said that Bella was acting out, that Bella was attention seeking she wasn't herself anymore and that led to me and Renée having a massive fall-out. No matter what I thought of that woman and how she treated Bella, I never said one bad thing about her in front of our daughter and never tried to turn her against her.

If Bella was attention seeking it was because Renée wasn't giving her enough attention, if she was acting out it was because she was sick of babysitting her own mother.

Then their number changed, the address changed and as quickly as I found a new address she always seemed one step ahead of me. I was surprised to find that they never moved too far, but Renée was smart and managed to keep herself hidden. I was already planning on trying to go there with a lead on an address even if it's just to visit Bella for a few days and come back - I just missed my daughter and then I got the call from Phil.

I spent every minute since that call smiling to myself earning some strange look from Billy and the boys until I explained that Bella was coming back and Jacob gave a rare smile...

I thought back to the diner briefly and how Jacob ordered a burger. It may not seem like a big deal, but for someone as sick as Jacob it was. He would eat a handful of chips if we were lucky and there he was finishing the chips and ordering more food. The hospital must have found something that had an effect on him.

I thought about Billy for a bit, the trouble that man was going through trying to look after himself and Jacob its a good thing that Jacob had Embry and Quil, even some of the other boys would stop by and help both of them. Maybe Bella would stop by one day and keep him company, a new person with something else to talk about.

**BPOV**

I got off the plane carefully. Due to my medications and my doctors notes I was offered a wheelchair but declined. I didn't have much energy but it was more than I was used to and walking would make a nice change. I could rest at Charlie's after all. I had a member of staff escorting me through the airport in case I needed help and he took my suitcases off the belt and put them on a trolley for me. He proceeded to push the trolley. It might have something to do with the fact that I look half dead, am on more medication than anyone else and am so thin that I could collapse at any moment.

I slowly made it out and found the coffee-house by the entrance of the airport and I thanked the man who had helped me. I sat down and ordered myself a hot chocolate when i saw him approach the table "Bella" he said, careful not to startle me, I looked up and beamed at him.

The pain in my body since getting off the plane did feel a bit less, and I managed to pull the strength to stand up and give my dad a hug. He got himself a coffee and we sat in silence... Not awkward silence, more tired silence.

**CPOV**

I took a look at Bella and she looked really ill. She was thin and could barely stand. Maybe the standing thing was just tiredness from the journey we all know how planes can make you legs all stiff and horrible.

She looked like she was wearing a few layers so I couldn't determine how thin she actually was, but I could see dark circles under her eyes and her face, so thin! I stood from my seat and reached my hand out to help Bella up from her seat, and we walked slowly to the exit with her bags. I opened the door for her in the cruiser and put her suitcases in. Again we were quiet but it wasn't awkward. I have time to catch up so for today I can let her rest.

**BPOV**

I must have fallen asleep in the cruiser because the ride to Forks was very quick. We pulled up at Charlie's house - my home now and I felt hungry again. I was surprised because I ate on the plane too, and the meal in the airport - this wasn't like me...

Maybe Renée was right and the solution to the problem was coming back to Forks. I would speak to the doctors when I go for a check-up next week, they want to get their own set of results on me at the same time as taking over my care from Phoenix.

A few minutes later Charlie asked me if I wanted to go to get some dinner, which I agreed to. I sifted through the packets of medication and found the ones I take at dinner time and took them with some water and followed Charlie out of the house.

**CPOV**

We reached the diner quite quickly and ordered some food. I chose a steak and Bella looked at the menu for ages before settling on a Spaghetti Bolognese with a side of garlic bread. I watched her eat out of the corner of my eye but she seemed to have a healthy appetite, maybe I was over-reacting about how thin she was she may have just been ill and lost a bit of weight or something. I'd keep an eye on her but she's eating now so I won't say anything.

I thought about giving her a few days before mentioning Jacob giving her time to settle in and look around the town. I needed to ask Billy when the truck would be finished it could take a couple of weeks for Jacobs friends to finish working on it so until then she'd only be able to travel around with me.


	5. Chapter 5

**Enjoy the chapter. Please note they are slowly getting better since the distance between them has reduced, but as they are still apart they still feel a lot of it, but are able to do things such as eat and walk about now.**

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**JPOV**

I woke up that morning feeling refreshed and alive. Well more alive then usual. I managed to climb in the bath, making use of Billy's bathseat to help get myself in. I didn't think I could stand for too long. I relaxed and let myself enjoy the hot water around me for a bit and pulling over the shower hose, I washed my hair.

I went into the kitchen and sat down. I felt weak and hungry. Dad was sitting at the table too and was surprised to see me up and dressed. "I'm hungry" I grinned and his face lit up. I've never had 2 days in a row with an appetite. We made arrangements to go to the diner for breakfast and I sent Embry and Quil a text to see if they wanted to come.

30 minutes later we heard a commotion outside and I made my way to the door and opened it to find Quil and Embry wrestling in the front. For the first time in years I wanted to join in but my energy was limited.

We all piled into Embry's car, with Embry and Quil helping Billy into the seat and headed to the diner. I helped myself to a full breakfast and finished it before the others were half done. They all looked at me smiling and I couldn't help but grin back.

"I worked it out what's wrong with you bro" Quil suddenly said

I looked up at him

"Withdrawal symptoms for Bella Swan"

We all started laughing

"No hear me out man, she was last here 3 years ago right and you started getting ill 3 years ago"

I shook my head

"She was only here for a few days, we had a falling out on the phone and we didn't see each other, so its been about 4 years since I've seen her"

Quil sat back feeling a bit dismayed.

"Why did you fall out?" Embry asked me

"Over something stupid... She was only here 2 weeks anyway wasn't she?" I answered.

We went silent for a moment

"So how's your condition son?"

"Well I seem to have a bit of energy, I can't stand for long but I managed to do what I needed to this morning. I still feel a lot of pain but I have an appetite again. It seems to be going but I'm still feeling half dead"

Billy nodded his head. "Well you can't just be cured overnight, It'll be a long process"

"Maybe they have the mix of medicines right this time" I offered and Billy nodded.

We all sat around watching Billy finish his meal and then he turned to Quil and Embry.

"Boys can you get that truck finished soon, Charlie said he'll be looking for something for Bella to drive around and offered me a good price for it."

Quil and Embry nodded and the thought of fixing up the car sounded interesting "I'll try help a bit if I can" I was starting to find these looks from dad Quil and Embry quite entertaining.

"Maybe we should order in for lunch... I'm just concerned what if the last 2 days has been a fluke and I wake up feeling ill, I'm too thin I don't want to be brought back to the hospital again. I'll try get the weight back on for however long I feel a bit more bearable" I said to my dad.

"Sure I think that's the best thing but this is the best you've been in 3 years so don't lose hope Jacob" My dad said.

**SPOV**

I got a call from Billy this morning about Jacob, Billy was telling me that Jacob was seeming to get better. I felt really happy for them the poor boy was in agony, I could almost feel his pain. The poor boy was close to phasing a few years back and was suddenly overcome by a mystery illness which stopped him phasing. I remember on occasion I've stopped by to see him and watch him wear away to almost nothing. He's been hospitalised and everything.

Jacob was the first one supposed to phase. Billy didn't know it at the time, but Jacob was showing slight symptoms of becoming the first wolf. The illness came along and for some reason that took away his turn to phase. He never phased he went back to normal... well with the illness. I phased a few weeks later, A few months after Paul followed and last year it was Jared.

I remembered about 6 months back Billy came to me at his wit's end. He begged me for help and not the packs proudest moment but he begged us to make Jacob phase. Billy knew about the pack mind and the healing through his journals and thought if Jacob phased then we could see his mind and maybe someone could work out what had happened, or becoming a shifter would give him the healing powers that would get rid off his illness.

I realised at that point how desperate Billy had become to make his son better, he was scared Jacob would give up and he was right as Jacob was slowly giving up as time went by. The recent events proved right. Jacob had given up. Billy was willing to give his son to become a wolf to save him from wasting away.

The way we went about getting him to phase hurt all of us to even remember. Billy left for a couple of hours and we had agreed for me to send Paul over to the house to make him phase. Billy knew what would be involved to make him angry and I remember the look on his face before he agreed. I felt sorry for him he had to make a difficult choice and he made the one that would possibly save his son no matter how hard it would make his life.

**PPOV**

I heard from Sam that Jacob was starting to recover from his illness and relief flowed through me. Normally I wouldn't give shit about some sick kid... but the state he had been in. No-one should be in that much pain.

I thought back 6 months ago when I went to visit him

**FLASHBACK 6 MONTHS AGO**

So Sam's sent me to piss off Baby Black. I felt a bit bad, he said the boy is sick and explained that this was to make him better. The kid couldn't eat, has been hospitalised was slowly wasting away. So Billy arranged for me to be company for a couple of hours. He told me to make Jacob angry enough to phase he begged me for it.

Like I said I felt bad, but there was a reason they chose me. I was mean and knew how to get anyone's backs up and make them angry. Never had I done this to a sick kid and that made me feel terrible but it was for his own good... right?

I done everything possible, I laughed at him and told him he's pathetic, I accused him of attention seeking, I teased him and laughed telling him only little girls get eating disorders. I basically made him feel like shit. Then I noticed a picture of him and Bella and their dads and brought it to him. I told him I fucked Bella Swan his little crush... I made her moan my name and that I wasn't the only one. The things I said about that girl to him I've never ever said before and never will again.

I went on for 2 hours tormenting that kid, i physically hated myself! Then the poor kid started crying. He fucking cried. I hated myself even more. I'd never say anything like what I said to him to anyone. I was told to say anything and everything I could to make him angry. I was told it was for his own good. Pick things that would hurt him that he would hate me for saying. Make him hate me, make him want to hurt me.

I knew what I was doing when I went in there and thought it was for the best. I hoped he would phase straight away and see in my mind being asked to do this, instead I had gone to a sick kids and fucked with his head so bad that this skinny sick kid that was bedbound and fucking had to be helped into the bathroom to use the toilet cried. Like his life wasn't hard enough I had to just make it worse!

It didn't work. I felt the despair roll of him and the sadness and could almost feel his pain. I got down to him at eye level and fucking begged him to forgive what I said. I told him that I didn't mean a word and I'll make this up to him. I swore I had his back when he needs it. Then I told him one day he will understand my reasons behind this conversation but at that point he didn't and I left. I never went back after that because I felt like shit about the situation, but I stuck around nearby hoping for a chance to start proving myself to him if he needed it.

It was agreed that if he did ever get better and phase... or if there was no more phasing and when he became chief then it would be explained what I had done and the reasons behind it. I had never wanted anyone to forgive me before but it still haunts me the look in his eyes that day. He was almost dead and I just made it worse!

**JPOV**

We got back from the diner and Quil and Embry helped my dad inside. I went straight into the garage. I had been in a few times since I got ill, on the days where the pain seemed slightly more bearable I would come sit on the sofa and watch my friends and chat for a bit.

Today I was ready to fix the truck for Bella. I may not be the old Jacob but there was no way I was sitting around whilst I had a good day with a bit of energy. I slowly made my way around the truck taking her in and seeing what Embry and Quil had done to it. It was a truck that we had all worked on when we were younger, now Embry and Quil had restarted it to Billy's request and I knew I wanted to take part... To interact with my friends, I wanted to drive up to that house and deliver the truck to Bella myself.

That would have to wait, I'm not allowed to drive due to the medications and more embarrassing I hadn't finished my driving lessons due to the illness. With that I headed inside to speak to Billy about having a few refresher lessons.

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**Paul's not a bad person. He done all that to make Jacob phase on the hope that the pain would disappear as wolves heal fast and Billy thought maybe its something that would heal as a wolf.  
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**If you like, please review :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Just to let readers know - the pain is from being away from the imprint. It started going away as the distance between them lessened but the fact that they are still not together is causing the pain to come back. It's not as bad as before but it's still pretty bad.**

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**BPOV**

A week later I asked Charlie to take me to the hospital as I had to see the doctor due to my referral from my previous hospital. I had improved for a while but started feeling the pain again. It wasn't as bad, but I worried it would get worse. Charlie looked at me with a confused look on his face and I realised Renée hadn't told him about my condition.

I knew the hospital would explain better so I just mentioned I haven't been feeling my best and I told him to come to my appointment with me.

I came down with a rucksack - it was my hospital bag. It contained diaries of my illness, I had tried to record each day how I felt what was wrong with me that day. Where the worse pains were, how much I had managed to eat. Everything was recorded in these books and there were a lot of books. I had tried to look for a pattern in the illness but there was none.

I also had all my medication in the bag, and every doctors note I had been given in a folder. Last but not least there was a few days worth of underwear and a couple of change of clothes, some books, my iPod and a few other bits. These were in there in case of another emergency like what happened a few days before I left my mum, and considered that the hospital may need to run their own tests on me and may need me to stay at the hospital.

I noticed Charlie kept looking at me, but we drove in silence to the hospital "What Doctor are you seeing?" Charlie asked me and I pulled out my letter "Dr Cullen" I answered and Charlie nodded "He only started a couple of weeks ago" He told me.

I arrived at the hospital and headed in for my appointment. I spoke to a nice girl at reception who my dad seemed to know. She told us that since Dr Cullen had started he had been getting anyone under the department to come in and have tests rerun so he could look at the cases and see if he could provide a new outlook. The girl also introduced herself as Jessica and she assigned me a room to put my stuff in just in case they kept me in. I went into the room and sat on the bed and waited. Charlie was frowning at me still and I got worried. Would he want me here if I was this ill?

A few minutes after sitting waiting and wondering what Charlie was going to make of all this and whether he would be happy to keep me here, I felt my pain lessen. It had got to a point where I could manage to breath deeply and properly but then it came back and the intensity of it had me doubled over hyperventilating into my lap. "Cramps" I gasped as Charlie started asking what was happening.

As we were waiting I heard Charlies phone go off. He answered quickly "yeah... yeah... where?... I'll be there" and hung up. "Sorry Bells but there's been an accident I've gotta head in. We'll talk later?" he said and I nodded. He headed off and I pulled out my iPod.

I had some time to think once Charlie had left - it was just like Renée to pawn me off on him without telling him that I was ill. I was worried that Charlie wouldn't want to look after me and wondered how much I should tell him. Maybe I should wait until these tests have been done and see if the results came up with what was wrong with me. For now I'll tell Charlie its girl stuff - painful cramps, and repeat bladder infections. Hopefully he'll be happy to not know any more than that.

I wasn't waiting long before the girl from reception - Jessica came and got me. "Follow me to Dr Cullen's office" she smiled at me. I gave a smile back and followed.

The ache that had come on before was lessening as I walked and I started to falter by a door. Something was telling me to open that door and walk in. "Miss Swan are you alright?" Jessica's voice caught my attention and I smiled "sorry I just... just am not myself" I said. I didn't know how to explain the moment I just had. Jessica smiled at me again and I followed her again.

We reached a room and Jessica knocked. "Bella Swan to see you Dr Cullen" she said and I heard the words "come in" through the door. Jessica gave me one last smile and went off down the hall and I opened the door.

I walked in to find a stunningly handsome blonde doctor sitting at a desk. I saw a movement to my side and looked over and my eyes locked with an even more handsome man, I couldn't tear my eyes away from his golden ones. I was transfixed.

"Miss Swan" The blonde said and I turned to him, the spell broken. "I'm Dr Cullen, but call me Carlisle" I nodded and reached out to shake his hand. I sat in the seat in front of him "You have met Edward, my son - he's currently in University studying medicine. He's here to learn. He will of course abide by all the rules of confidentiality. I need to know if this is ok. If you would rather he leave then he will do so."

"Its fine" I said, keeping my eyes on Dr Cullen. "Ok let's get started. I have your records in front of me from your last hospital there are a lot of symptoms so shall we start with your current condition?"

"Ummm well a few minutes ago I was in pain, the pain went down when I was coming here, but its come on again not as bad but pretty unbearable"

Carlisle nodded and questioned me further. I noticed he kept glancing at Edward, probably to make sure Edward was paying attention or something I guessed.

**EPOV**

Alice had visions of me with this girl. I saw the visions myself. Until one day Alice couldn't see her. I panicked and went to find her, but she was fine. Travelling home with her mother. I followed them, hoping that nothing would happened and I watched for a long time, watching her illness manifest and not being able to see in her head to help her.

The day she collapsed was the worst. I know her mother had decided to send her to Forks and breathed a sigh of relief. I made the call and the family were in Forks within the hour. However a few days later I found that she had changed her mind. She felt angry with herself for trying to take the easy route out and pushing Bella onto Charlie. She was Bella's mother and she would look after her daughter. She would be strong for Bella.

I didn't like this change of mind. I had realised that the best thing for Bella was to be in Forks. My family could move there so I could see her rather than sneaking around watching her at risk of getting caught easily by the amount of sun. Also Carlisle would take up a role at the hospital and he may be able to help her with her illness. If it wasn't curable I would turn her. She is my singer, and will be my mate.

I went to her house when Phil had taken Bella out and easily convinced her I worked for the hospital. It was easy getting into the house and once I was in I drew her in. Renée didn't know what had happened in fact she would have no memory of me whatsoever. Me telling her to make sure Bella went to Forks. telling Renee that she was better off just her and Phil - she thought it was her own idea and my suggestion to her was more powerful than any decision that she had made for herself. She got Phil to tell her and she sent her.

**BPOV**

We had finished going over everything and Carlisle seemed very interested in my journals. He requested a follow-up appointment in a weeks time to run any tests that he deems necessary and requested to keep the journals.

"I'll walk you out Miss Swan" Edward said to me as I stood up "Bella" I corrected him. He walked to the door and I thanked Carlisle and left.

"So you haven't lived here long?" I asked - trying to make conversation. I made the mistake of looking into his eyes and his eyes were messing with me. I was feeling myself pulled towards him but I knew I didn't want to feel that. The part of me that caused all the pain was stopping him. Stopping him from what? I was confused about what was happening so many thoughts were popping into my head as I tore my eyes away from his.

"No, we moved from Alaska" Edward told me "I hate to be so forward but seeing as we are both new in town would it be too much to ask you if you would like to spend some time together? It would be nice to have a friend around here"

I was about to say no but caught the last part about having a friend and felt guilty for assuming he meant something else. Why would I assume that anyway it's not like me.

We ended up swapping numbers and I walked towards the exit feeling empty and hollow with every step I took away from the hospital.

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**Sorry about the delay. I've not been well. Hopefully it all makes sense :)**


	7. Chapter 7

**Jacobs appointment was after Bella's, so this is happening at the same time apart from the appointment which happens after Bella's appointment)**

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**JPOV**

I was off with my dad to the hospital, I had a new specialist Dr Cullen. Dad seemed to have a problem when the letter came through asking me to attend a meeting with Dr Cullen so he can do his own tests and come to his own conclusions about my health. I was told there would be a possibility that I would be kept in whilst running a new set of tests so brought all my notes and some clothes and my ipad.

I managed to convince dad to allow me this appointment, my health had started to get worse and I was hoping this new doctor would have a different outlook on things.

I turned up at the hospital to see Charlie and Bella getting into a lift. I wanted to call and wave but the doors had closed. I doubt either of then would have seen my anyways but for the split second I saw Bella I could see she was more beautiful than ever. I remembered that she had such beautiful eyes I could look into them for hours, but today she was too busy on her phone to look up. I knew that I'd have to be faster in my plans to meet her but for today I had my appointment to focus on.

The receptionist viewed the letter and told us to head up to the 5th floor to the reception there and the receptionist would point me in the direction of Dr Cullen's department.

I smiled at the girl on reception we had become quite good friends due to all my visits here and she came around the desk and gave me a hug "haven't seen you in a while Jake" she joked and we started chatting about what we had been upto - Jessica chatting about her and her boyfriend going on holiday, I told her about how I actually managed to do some work on the car and managed to eat. We walked to a room and I found myself drawn to another room. I really wanted to go in there. "Jacob?" Billy said snapping me out of it and I continued walking. The pain getting more intense with each step until I felt breathless. Billy lead me into the next room and I lay on the bed hoping the sensation would pass.

About 15 minutes later a nurse came in to do the usual checks including blood pressure. I was told that Doctor Cullen was still with someone who has been seen before me but I'm his next appointment.

**BillyPOV**

We sat in the room until Jessica came to get us. "Billy, Dr Cullen would like to see you first. I'll come and get Jacob when he is ready to see Jacob" Jessica came behind me and pushed me into the Dr's office. I was sitting face to face with Carlisle Cullen.

"Mr Black" He greeted me

"Doctor Cullen" I replied.

He looked over my shoulder to a man sitting behind me and the man nodded "he is aware" the man told Carlisle.

"That is my son Edward. You may have a record of him also he is on the treaty. I would like to first apologise as Edward is a mind reader. I needed to know if you were aware of what we are, of your tribes shape shifters and of the treaty"

"Yes. There is a pack on the rez already" I replied. I was not happy having my mind read by this other vampire. "I want you to know that me being here does not mean I trust you or your coven. You can see by my sons file that his health is really bad and I will try anything if it were to make him well again even if it means accepting your help" I kept my gaze on him and he smiled.

"That's why Edward is here. You see he is in medical school, and is assisting me here on permission from his university. As he can read minds, he can see what's wrong with someone better than they can express how they feel. This way we can get a more accurate understanding of what is wrong. That is why I have taken this role, so I can look into helping people who no-one has been able to in the past. He is also training as a psychiatrist for the same reason. If we can get your son thinking of the day this all started then there is a possibility that Edward can read what happened that day and work out the symptoms in the order they started and if something triggered them.

We can also bring in the possibility that he has more than one condition maybe the second condition brought on by the first. If we look at what were the first symptoms then we can separate the symptoms and possibly work this out better."

I nodded. I actually felt really glad all of a sudden that I had allowed Jacob to come here. If only Dr Cullen arrived 6 months ago before Paul broke Jacob... or even a few weeks ago before Jacob threw himself off a cliff.

"There was nothing in his records saying he jumped off a cliff" Edward said and I turned and glared at him. "I will allow you to look into Jacobs mind to help him and I will appreciate anything you do for him but my head and my thoughts are my own and I would advise you to stay out of it" I growled at him.

Edward glared back and then looked away. I turned my gaze back to Carlisle.

"Yes he threw himself off the cliff. I fear it may be partly my fault. I asked the pack to make him phase as the healing of the pack may have possibly cured him. I wasn't sure if it would but I would take the chance. Even if it didn't the rest of the pack would be able to see his mind and maybe work out what was wrong. I allowed one of the pack to go to my house for a couple of hours as I left under strict instructions to make Jake as angry as possible to use whatever information he needed to say whatever he had to so Jake would phase.

But I think the illness is stopping him from phasing. Sam reported back to me some of the things that Paul had said, and I can understand why I came home to find Jacob worse than when I left him, he was crying and his body was hurting even more. I think the conversation broke Paul too. He had to torment my son for 2 hours and I don't think he has forgiven either me or Sam for asking him to do so. I find him lurking near the house sometimes"

Carlisle frowned at me "but what illness can stop a wolf from phasing. Jacob is your son he has the wolf gene. I remember when we were here last Edward checked out the minds of the last pack and one had cancer and the phasing cured it. Could it be a problem with his body refusing the wolf inside?"

I sighed "I'll go through the old journals and see if I can find anything"

I watched Carlisle nod

"I'm trusting you with my sons health Dr Cullen"

Carlisle picked up the phone and called Jessica's extension. "Please send Jacob Black in"

**JPOV**

Billy was only gone a few minutes before I was called in myself. I went in the room and looked around. I noticed the 3 of them watching me so I sat down in a chair next to my dad.

"Nice to meet you Jacob I'm Dr Cullen. Call me Carlisle" said the blonde haired man in front of me "this is my son Jacob, he goes to university in training to be a doctor and is also doing a course in psychology. Do you mind him sitting in to this appointment?"

"No he's fine to stay" I said

"Ok Jacob first I'd like you to talk about your symptoms, when they are at their worst if its morning or night or after exercise or after laying down. I'll take notes and decide whether to run some tests."

I went through all my symptoms the aches, pains, nausea, shaking, chills, passing out, loss of appetite and everything else I could think of. I explained how the last few days I had felt better but slowly getting worse again and Carlisle nodded. "I have someone else who seems to have a similar condition yet I can't say that for certain without having a diagnosis. I was hoping with you and my other patient maybe looking at all your symptoms as a whole I might be able to get a clear picture"

He paused for a moment

"The best thing to start with would be your blood pressure, maybe get some blood tests done. I'll get those rushed so the results will arrive today and I'll work from them to decide what other tests to conduct. There is you and one other person on my schedule with long-term illnesses that I wish to get on the way to recovery.

Lets try establish a timeline. So when did this all start? Can you run me through your day and try pinpoint the moment you noticed something was up or something was different?"

Half an hour later I was in the room again. I was waiting for a nurse to come and take my blood for the tests that Dr Cullen was hoping to run. I could tell there was something else going on why else would Dr Cullen want to see my dad first, but no-one was letting anything slip. I'd find out what was going on myself.

I just had to keep in mind I wasn't the only person dealing with this - I was right when I felt someone else's pain I just had to work out somehow who his other patient is, if I find them maybe I can work this out for myself.

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Please review :)


	8. Chapter 8

Sorry to post this instead of an update.

I AM continuing all my stories, and the updates will start up again soon. I have my reasons for not updating and have a lot more ideas for stories in the works. Please keep an eye out and my stories will be back soon. I am in the process of writing. I am considering the option of finishing one of the four stories at a time so the updates are faster and I don't have to read the whole story to make sure I haven't mixed up information. I am unsure which story will be written first I have to re-read them and work out which will be shortest and work my way though.

Thank you to everyone who has favourite me or my stories and who are following me or my stories. Hopefully I won't disappoint with my updates.

Liza


	9. Chapter 9

**Sorry its taken so long for the update. I will admit I'm not good as portraying conversations between people so if anyone can provide me some tips I would appreciate it.**

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**EDWARD**

"So they started getting ill at the same time" I told Carlisle

"Similar symptoms" He replied

"But not the same" I frowned

"According to these diaries it is the same"

"So when I look into his mind and see the pain he's going through, she's going through the same thing?"

"We should assume so. Everything else matches including the time frame they were ill, and when Jacob was last in hospital, Bella was admitted too. Something must have caused it" Carlisle told me.

We sat in silence for a bit, thinking.

"Were they doing anything together 3 years ago so they could have encountered something at the same time?" Carlisle asked

"No I caught him thinking about her and he hasn't seen her for about 4 years now. So he hadn't seen her for a year before he started being ill"

"I've never had to say this but we've hit a wall here"

"I noticed his pain went for a while but its coming back again, a bit worse than he makes out"

"That means Bella will get ill again"

"Possibly if their conditions are linked"

"If she gets worse again then I can turn her" I decided

"You would willing turn a human Edward? Have you... have you chosen her as your mate?"

"She intrigues me Carlisle it's too soon to tell, but changing her would stop her suffering"

"You would change her? Shes not dying"

"We don't know that"

"Do not change her unless we find out that this mystery illness is fatal. It's not how we do things Edward"

**BELLA**

I had told Charlie that I hadn't been well for a long time now. He questioned me and I saw not my father but the chief of police make an appearance, looking for cracks in my story. I admitted that Renée thought I had an eating disorder, I'd been to therapy and that it was me collapsing that was why Renée sent me here. He frowned at me for a minute and asked me to explain what happened when I collapsed and I told him when it happened and how it felt. I saw his frown deepen as he thought for a bit. He asked me when I collapsed and I told him and he looked surprised.

I had hoped that was the end of it, but the questioning took a different form. Charlie asked me if I had started feeling better the day I was travelling and I told him I was, I explained about how the pain was less here but still painful.

Charlie questioned me asking me why I didn't tell him before and before I knew it I had admitted that I was scared that he might not want me either if I told him. I felt him pull me in for a hug "I'll always want my little girl Bells" he replied to me.

We moved away from each other and there was silence for a moment. "I think I'm going to invite Billy over for dinner tomorrow - and Jacob too" Charlie told me and I felt myself smile "its been so long since I've seen Jacob" I replied and Charlie asked me if I'd get in touch with Jacob and organise it. He gave me Jacobs number and I decided to text him when I didn't have Charlie staring at me waiting for me to do it.

An hour later I was up in my room. I wondered if Saturday was too short notice since it was Friday already but I decided to text anyway and see.

_"Hi its Bella. Charlie gave me your number"_

_"Hey good to hear from you its been so long. How you doing?"_

_I've been better. My dad wanted me to ask if you and your dad wanted to come over for dinner Saturday?"_

_"Yeah that sounds great what time do you want us over"_

_"What times best for you?"_

_"Well we could come over around 4 maybe hang out a bit before dinner?"_

_"I'd like that, I haven't seen you in so long Jacob :) x"_

_"I've missed you Bells. Do you need me to bring anything tomorrow? x" _

_"No just as long as you are definitely coming... x " _

_"We'll be there. Can't wait to see you again x"_

**JACOB**

The surprise on my face when I saw Bella's text made Embry and Quil laugh "I've never seen that face Black who's texting you"

I smiled at them and started writing my reply. Within seconds of sending mine, there was a reply. Quil made his way over trying to get a look "Oh it looks to be the lovely Bella"

Him and Embry burst into giggles, not even laughing just giggling like some little girls. I couldn't help but smile every time I got a reply. I was looking forward to the next day.

**EDWARD**

I had worked out what was wrong with them. According to Jacob there was a point in the hospital when the pain went down down down and then burst back up. I had figured that to be the time that him and Bella had only the door between them.

"He jumped off a cliff and Bella had collapsed unable to breathe at the same precise time..."

I knew I had to be right. "Bella and Jacob have imprinted"

I let out a sigh I knew what I had to do, I had enjoyed my friendship with Bella but she wasn't meant to be mine. She wasn't ill it was the effects of losing an imprint. If there was no imprint it would be a different story but there was. She wasn't mine. "She can't be mine" I whispered to myself.

"She could be yours" came a voice behind me. I turned to look and found Alice waiting for me.

I had to admit I was curious to Alice's comment. I had spent so long alone and the first girl who had ever caught my eye was the future mate of the future Alpha.

"If she's one of us she can't be one of them Edward"

I stayed silent, my thoughts hurting my head. I had to do the right thing, should do whats right and let Bella be happy. Can't damn her like I am... Don't listen to the voices Edward and Don't listen to Alice. Do what's right do whats right..."

"I've seen it Edward, her shopping with me, sitting chatting with Esme, wrestling as a newborn with Emmett... just open your mind and look at my vision Edward"

I kept my mind closed as desperate as I was to see, as much as my own voices were telling me to look at it I held back with every shread of control I had.

"I've seen more Edward, I've seen her with you. If you turn her she'll be your mate..."

I felt myself slipping and held tighter it was no use I knew she had me but I tried so hard... I felt my hands clenched through my hair pulling trying to distract myself trying to control myself.

"I've seen you with her Edward, I've seen you and her. Together. In bed, I can see her face clearly you can make her feel so good, just take a look Edward just listen to her voice in my vision... screaming your name in pleasure" She whispered the last part.

That was it. I opened my mind and let Alice's vision in.

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**I like Alice in the films - but for my story she just works to push at Edward. I wanted Edward to not be the evil vampire I tend to make him, to just be confused and push and messed up instead. He wants Bella to be happy but he wants to be with Bella. The voices, Alice and the visions are not helping him make a proper decision on what to do.**


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